Teaching Self-Control, the American Way – NYTimes.com

Good news!  You don’t have to be a tiger mom — or a French bringer-upper-of-beber to instill self control and initiative in your kido.  Check this article on good old fashion American play as a way to develop your child’s mental and physical strengths.


Teaching Self-Control, the American Way – NYTimes.com.

3 Ways that Kids’ Anger Bites Back | Psychology Today


Signe Whitson is a licensed social worker and co-author of The Angry Smile: The Psychology of Passive Aggressive Behavior in Families, Schools, and Workplaces,

Posted in Psychology today a great article on helping kids with anger.  My experience is we have too many kidos who do not have good strategies to address their feelings of anger and we need to do more to help them out.  Check out the article and see if your seeing any of this in your little one.


3 Ways that Kids’ Anger Bites Back | Psychology Today.

Helping Kids Lean from Mistakes

Mistakes Improve Children’s Learning


Marilyn Price-Mitchell, Ph.D., writes about the new psychology of success.  She lists:

Ten Parenting Guidelines that Help Kids Learn from Mistakes


  • Acknowledge that you don’t expect your children to be perfect.
  • Let them know your love is unconditional, regardless of their mistakes or lapses in judgment.
  • Don’t rescue children from their mistakes. Instead, help them focus on the solution.
  • Provide examples of your own mistakes, the consequences, and how you learned from them.
  • Encourage them to take responsibility for their mistakes and not blame others.
  • Avoid pointing out their past mistakes. Instead, focus on the one at hand.
  • Praise them for their ability to admit their mistakes.
  • Praise them for their efforts and courage to overcome setbacks.
  • Mentor them on how to apologize when their mistakes have hurt others.
  • Help them look at the good side of getting things wrong!

Change How You Praise Your Children to Assure They Reach Their Potential

Change How You Praise Your Children to Assure They Reach Their Potential.


A very nice summary of how to apply the new psychology of success to children struggling with homework.  The idea of fostering on a “growth mindset” rather than a “fixed mindset” in our kids is an excellent way to use their struggles to build the resiliency they will need to be successful in life.

Raising Emotionally Healthy Children

Excerpt:  People who are emotionally unhealthy and without good coping mechanisms can make bad choices, choices that can harm, whether it’s self-medication with drugs and alcohol or choosing bad relationships. I know I can’t control what my kids do when they grow up, but I feel I have an important role to play.  I can model good coping skills to the best of my ability.  I can share my own feelings and how I deal with them.  I can talk about the times I’ve made mistakes, or when I’ve been afraid or anxious and how I handled it.  I can teach them about boundaries.

Read the rest


Marilyn Price-Mitchell, Ph.D. provides a great overview of fostering initiative in our kids.  She makes three important points about initiative building activities:

  • Kids must choose it for themselves because it gives them “internal” rewards!  Examples include music programs, service-learning, and a myriad of other after-school activities.
  • The activity must take place in an environment that contains rules, challenges, and complexities inherent in the real world.  They must face intellectual, interpersonal, and intrapersonal challenges that go beyond grades, winning a game, and other external rewards.
  • The activity must be sustained over a period of time.  Rather than doing lots of activities, it is better to focus on a few for longer periods of time so kids learn to persevere despite challenges.

Check out the full article at the link or on her blog at Psychology Today.



Tune Into Your Kids’ Party Music – It May Shock You! | Lifetime Moms






Tune Into Your Kids’ Party Music – It May Shock You! | Lifetime Moms.

Our kids need to know that we care about what they are interested in.  Not that we need to agree with it!  Be sure you are communicating the values of your family as you discuss the culture your kids are immersed in.

My son sees lots of violent images on the playground.  Exploding zombie heads with sniper rifles seems to be the latest from the boy across the street.  But,  he knows that our family values peace, kindness and justice. He gets to choose how to act when I’m not around, so I want to be sure he knows what an “Irvin” does in those circumstances.  Most of the time, he makes good choices, even when I’m not looking!  That’s real victory.

What If You Don’t Know What Your Passion Is? Where to Look | Liz Strauss at Successful Blog

What If You Don’t Know What Your Passion Is? Where to Look | Liz Strauss at Successful Blog. Last week I spoke with a number of young adults who had difficulty telling me what they wanted to do when they finished high school.  They had difficulty putting a finger on what they were “passionate about”.  When you don’t know the answer (or think you don’t) it is pretty hard to really care about school, grades, taking the SAT & ACT tests… But, once you discover what it is that you were meant to do, the other pieces start to fall into place.  Check out this perspective on knowing what your passion is.  Maybe it will help some of you get excited about your future in a way you never have before.